missing the old times :(

when i was still a child, i can say we were a happy family. we have family bondings and outings, we could have what we want and most of all life before was simple. but as time goes by, it is changing constantly... i thought that as we grow up.. things would be easier to deal with.. but it is even complicated. the older we get.. the more we "suffer".. the more complicated it is.. as the youngest among the siblings i thought our life would be better.. i am the only one left in college and that my sisters are done schooling.. but life is getting harder for my parent's.. my father is sick and problematic.. and i don't know how to help him... sometimes i feel i am being selfish.. i always get what i want but i am not satisfied with what i have.. i can't help but compare... why my sisters can have the luxurious things wanted... but that was before... when they were during my age.. haha.. but now.. i couldn't get what i wanted.. i miss the old times... the family bonding... the life during my childhood... my sisters... the hassle-free life...

now.. i have realized at the age of 19(euw! haha) life is constantly changing.. and the more we get older.. there are more problems and challenges we encounter.. it is more complicated.. i'm tired of having this situation... sana umunlad na ang pinas para di na maghirap ang mga tao... haha.. duh.. blaming our situation to the country.. haha..

i have to put this in mind.. to be optimistic.. the problems we are encountering right now would make our family stronger and would bond us together,,, kaya... gusto ko na mag.shift kasi nakakapagod na ang nursing.. wahahaha.. far out. shocks! i hope i can survive in this kalbaryo... quitter pa naman ako.. and sana i'm gonna change this negative attitude...

gut feeling... or not!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feeling#Gut_feeling
Gut feeling

A gut feeling, or gut reaction, is a visceral emotional reaction to something, and often one of uneasiness. Gut feelings are generally regarded as not modulated by conscious thought.

"Gut feeling" may also be used as a short-hand term for an individual's "common sense" perception of what is "the right thing to do", such as helping an injured passerby, avoiding dark alleys, and other seemingly instinctive feelings about a given situation. It can also refer to common knowledge that some phrases are true no matter when said, such as "The sky is blue," "Fire is hot," and even individual beliefs in quotation like "Allan loves wally more" and other such statements (which may or may not be true, but to the sayer are more true than anything).

Gut feelings, like all reflexive unconscious comparisons, can be re-programmed by practice or experiences.

gut feeling and maybe some intuition... or not..

there was this one time when someone texted me saying something.. after what he had said... i had a feeling that there's something with what the person had said... and.. as a defense mechanism... i was slowly trying to avoid that person... it is not that i hate him.. but i think it is not right.. or maybe i don't know... is it me or is it the person who texted me was the problem.. then he texted me again... saying something different... i thought i could get over it and tried to neglect and avoid it.. but i was simply avoiding the person... maybe my intuition or gut feeling was right...

2nd time... chesna and i was having a conversation in ym... while we were talking... i saw her status message... it was about a dream.. and guess about the dream turned out to be right..

3rd time... another conversation with chesna... an incident happened to her and again... my guess turned out to be right.. haha. the next MADAM Auring.. >:)

there are these instances that i wish it was true... because there was this one person that makes me feel different... but i don't know if it's just me who's feeling it or both... that person is so unpredictable... and it makes me feel confused.